Monday, January 17, 2022



still recovering from sickness. only eating scrambled eggs and bacon like a five-year-old kid who eats fries and chicken fingers 3 meals a day. the key is not the taking of the Vanquish when you're hungry, the key is to get through a day WITHOUT popping a Vanquish

1. what is one thing your significant other could do to you to rock your world? marry me.

we rent a camper van that becomes our only house. we drive down to Los Angeles and park by a water tower. we become a husband-and-wife writing team. four-camera sitcoms, CW dramas, K-Pop, that sort of thing. we vow NEVER to write reality shows. no matter how thin the funds. during our show's many hiatuses we bungalow in hammocks attached to our camper in the Simi Valley Mountains.

2. you have been granted the super power you've always wanted, how do you abuse it?

squander thy name is Phoenix. you mean besides the Baileys Irish Cream Keurig cup that smells like alcohol but contains none? i immediately choose a model for wifey. but it's not a Brazilian model, see? that's the key, the Brazilian model is sturdier, lasts longer, enters into a real marriage like Gisele. but instead in my haste things get messy and it all ends like the "Into The Great Wide Open" music video.

3. for sexy play would you rather be tied up or tie someone else up?

tie someone else up. do the tying. cos i've never experienced Boxing Day, you know? right? everybody else has that day after Christmas where they go crazy and do strange secret furtive things inside boxes. putting bows on things that shouldn't have bows, like violins. and for me it's just the day after Christmas...

4. best physical and nonphysical asset:

physical: my face. my head it's just weird. i have a weirdly-shaped looks like an overgrown pill...

nonphysical: my schizophrenic mind, there's a party in there that never stops...

5. referring to Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, if they were naming new dwarves beyond the seven what would your name be and why?

is it dwarfs or dwarves? 

Bondy. see picture above. he's the glue-sniffer of the group...


thebarefootsub said...

Boxing day is the best part of christmas! And now I know I should be hiding in boxes putting bows on things I like it even more!

the late phoenix said...

thebarefootsub: taking a stab in the dark there, wink wink. yeah i'd love to experience a Boxing Day! my girlfriend is British so once this covid thing is over---it's ending soon, right?---i can swim to England and join her for one

Jules said...

1: Morning Meditations

2: I’d be able to fly and I’d abuse this by beating rush hour traffic and getting the best views for concerts.

3: tie them up. I’m a controller.

4: sexy hair made me what I am inside and out.

5: Mischief. No explanation needed.


the late phoenix said...


i was thinking i'd have to do an "Into The Great Wide Open", that's scary for me

1. marry me, mah dahlin. i will help you with your Manifesting blog, whatever you want, i'll show you how to squat and do the Calm App voice on tape

2. a Catwoman who can fly, brilliant new idea for a comic book! the next Nine Inch Nails concert has been...canceled by Trent...

3. my sweet if you tie me up that will fulfill 5 sexual fantasies of mine rolled into one burrito...

4. check that, TIE ME UP WITH YOUR HAIR!!! i mean that's pretty kinky, right? afterwards we can film by the Irish Spring one of those Herbal Essences commercials where the ladies orgasm after one drop of shampoo falls on their hair

5. Manifesting Mischief

i love you, mah dahlin, never forget that. thank you for visiting me here, it's just me and 60-year-old Jim Carrey, it gets lonely


Smu Doodle said...

Simi Valley!?! Here I spent all that time in West Hollywood asking for directions to Seedy Valley. This,my friend,is what I call an epiphany. As a matter of fact; I will title it my 5th Epiphany. 🎶 Bum Bum Bum Buuuum 🎶

the late phoenix said...

Doctor Doodle: Seedy Valley, that's where all the Big Mac buns are grown on bun plants. there's Hollywood and then there's WEST Hollywood, glorious place. i had a 5th epiphany once but turns out it was Beethoven's 5th, which was really Beethoven just trying to complete his 10th.