notes:
* Jessica Barden: get bubblegum hair. get indie. get intimate. an intimate space.
* Phoenix: back-to-school excitement is somehow in the air!
kid: i LOVE to run home everyday!Phoenix: so then you're not really into school.
kid: especially when i get an F in P.E.
* Paris Hilton: i'm not dumb, Liberty Mutual, you're making fun of me with the Lady and the Tramp dog and Machine Gun Kelly who both have my hair made of gold. for the record, i DO bathe, without flea-and-tick shampoo.
* Pascal from Safelite: the couple noticed a chip in their window. so when they came back i fixed it for them. i gave them a bowl of potato chips. did you know Tostitos makes both chips AND salsa?
* Allstate: it's like having the Night Court theme in your backseat. like having a Miyazaki tree sitting next to Forrest Gump. why are ice cream cones a thing?, they always spill. it's worth it to drift your compact car around huggy turns to curve out of the way of a red Handball used against a brick wall. for Catholic grade school nostalgia.
Hugh: i TOLD my son not to get involved with that skateboarding mess! i told him skateboarding is only validated with a gold medal!
* Allstate: do not attempt to jump your compact car over a jumprope in double dutch.........we're not sure how you would be able to do this
* Dairy Queen Reese's Extreme Blizzard: i'm the daughter of Dora The Explorer and Vault Boy
* Reminiscence: sounds eerily similar to one of my scripts...
* Awkwafina: i've waited patiently. i've played the goofy sidekick. but look at me, i'm a smart capable babe! i'm the hottest actress in Hollywood, both meanings! when will it be time for an Asian woman superheroine on the silver screen! i am SO ready to play Silk!
James Gunn: yeah about that, the whole Marvel superhero thing has run its course, Hollywood is looking to move on to indie art films.
* Samsung: cool cool another roller coaster. has those flips of the stomach that only come from living in Florida...
* how can we have EVERYONE be successful? why must for one person to be successful the other person has to be homeless? our former President could have changed the system if he wanted to...
* Nike: we learn about real dynasties not patriarchal ones.
Marcus Aurelius: fair enough. but i did have some good quotes...
* antidisestablishmentarianism: i had a good run...
happy weekend, my babies
TOMORROW: the garlic burger. the Burger King one. the one with the garlic chips. the garlic discs. cos i'm a goth. cos i'm a vampire
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