Monday, May 24, 2021

TMIT: GARBAGE PAIL KIDS MONOPOLY!!!

 




1. do you typically wake up feeling optimistic?

no. but TMIT calms me down after i spill a whole mess of gooey grandma's chickenbake all over the linoleum. i ate it off the floor before my priest saw. i had to wash the floor with my tongue. my tongue is all sticky now. my socks are messed up, too, all covered in greasy rice bits. i feel i have a bunch of balled-up socks rolling around in my nose from that smell. i had to have a chocolate crepe-stick and Cutie orange to counter.

2. do you pursue your passions?

yes, so Thurston Howell III's wife and i are gonna need to fuck soon. i love Lovey. i applied to be her hitman's wife's bodyguard but she wanted a kept boy. why can't you collect $200 in real life? 

3. if your life was affected by covid 19 lockdowns/restrictions how have you pursued your passions during the pandemic?

yes it was. let's just say Jack Tripper gives me the shivers. in a good way. my writing got better, before i had to drink non-CDC levels of rhubarb seltzer to knock my brain out enough to cause a lucid dream, now it's easy for me to slip into a pandemic dream and those are WAY wilder. i had a dream where i had a splitting headache and the the only cure was eating peas and cubed chicken.

4. is there a conversation you need to have with someone but you have avoided? tell us the basic subject and your relationship to the person:

i'm in love with my best friend's wife. this best friend is like a brother to me. i wish we could just do the movie and never see each other again after, it's just too painful. ironically we would have had a clean set...

5. fill in the blank: when my partner is around i feel ____

uncomfortable. skittish. i'm a loner, i don't like being around other people.........this marriage isn't going to work out, is it?

BONUS: are you living in reality or a fabricated fantasy?

this life we know as existence is a hologram. know who's running this hologram? no it's not Bill Gates. no it's not Melinda Gates. it's actually Pete Davidson.






2 comments:

ancilla_ksst said...

I had one of those days too. I went out to cut the asparagus. It was mostly overgrown. Also, some bugs were eating it. Then I broke my scissors and gnats bit my ears. I retreated from the garden with only 4 asparaguses to show.

the late phoenix said...

ancilla: haha, i love that story, it makes me feel less alone, i was frazzled on Monday, my arm was dead from the second shot. hey, chickenbake with asparagus sounds good!

gnats bit my ears: that's what happened when i watched A Nightmare On Elm Street

HTMIT :)