LEMON-PEPPER LILY

 

notes:

* Archer on his knees crying: MOTHEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!

Jeffrey Tambor: i feel REALLY bad now...

Clint Eastwood: now there was a dame...

* Drake from State Farm: am i menacing or playful at the end there when i bite into the apple? the world may never know...

* whenever i hear that "Buttercup" song, i buck up, wipe away the tears, put on my hippie long-hair and brown nugget beads and mustard-colored vest with tassels, and eat a flower...oh and Reese's ridged peanut-butter Cups should have a flavor that's golden-brown and call it Buttercup Reese's...

* i love the '80s NOW and THEN but i missed that crucial Pet Shop Boys song! if i had known about it i'd be making money now!!!!!!!!!!

Arthur from Arthur: you would have heard it if you were in my Rolls Royce...along with my music...

* hot teacher: you wouldn't know it by my sweater but i got big tits. there, distracted you, where's my wings? i wouldn't have to be cruel to the kids if the teachers got a lunch break...

* Milana Vayntrub: I HAVE TO STAND BEHIND A DESK NOW?????!!!!! are you fatherfucking kidding me, this is absolutely RIDICULOUS. 

* Charlie Sheen: i can be a NASCAR driver.

Sean Young: not anymore, i'm here...

* Samuel L Jackson: there's no way i'd be friends with Charles Barkley! Spike Lee yes cos i ALWAYS need my next acting job...

Charles Barkley: why you gotta be in every movie?

Samuel: i don't do it for the money, i do it for the fix...

* counterboy: OMG i thought i was the only werewolf! you're a GIRL werewolf, too! 

girl werewolf: good thing i'm cute and you're not gay, our race can continue...

counterboy: how does the Cherry Vanilla Coke taste?

girl werewolf: like mouthwash. THIS is the best you can do, Coke? sigh with howl. WATERMELON COKE, there, do i have to do EVERYTHING for you, Coke?

* Spike Lee: you dumb, Chuck.

Charles Barkley: this is serious, we do NOT want to be in Paris, Texas, take it from me! we need to be in Paris, France NOW for more reasons than one!

* if you throw your iphone down the sewer grate Apple will fix it for free after killing the clown, but you STILL have to wait a day for the downloads to download...

CLICK HERE AND WATCH ALL 10

happy weekend, my babies

TODAY: quesalupa, Taco Bell. and the spicy potato, i'm  not vegan but that sounds good. can't do Saturdays anymore, no time. i've reordered and reorganized my ENTIRE life around one show: Saturday Night Live...