Friday, July 3, 2020



* seriously tho, that's one of the hottest magazine covers of all time. and it's historic cos it launches the movement, Playgirl #1. don't know about you but i love a woman who takes charge, who acts like a man in bed. who goes after all the sex she wants, wraps her legs around the guy she wants like a spider, humps his torso with her back, pulls the hairs on his chest by his chain...

* blonde: remember me?
brunette: it's memba me.
blonde: memba me?
brunette: members only. it's not like you're taking up rent-free residence in my head or anything.
blonde: it's know...from the other commercial...
brunette: don't recall you. i have more important things to think about. i'm fucked-up in the head.
blonde: so are we splitting this cab or...?
brunette: please don't use the word split around me...

* brunette: LITTLE BITCH!!!
blonde: what? what? what'd i do?!
brunette: sorry, i was yelling at my mom in my head.

* brunette: oh look, that's what we're both taking now...
blonde: i can't say the name of the tablets, it makes me laugh.
brunette: do the four pop-art faces there on that bus-stop talk to you, too?
blonde: no.
brunette: i'm not crazy. those are really supposed to be the cartoon versions of all of us from the last commercial...

* brunette: this drug is really helping me with my schizophrenia.
blonde: they help me with my weight...

* brunette: i hear the most terrible voices.
blonde: telling you you're fat?
brunette: no, mocking me for being an adult who stills wears a backpack.
blonde: in fairness, you were loitering around a grade school.
brunette: don't make fun of me. i went to Harvard but i never finished 3rd grade...

* blonde: i always think people are staring at me...
brunette: no, honey, you gotta look inward. you're uncomfortable cos you see a biracial couple walking down the street.
blonde: i also have bike bias. whenever i see a bicyclist wearing a helmet i have to yank that helmet off his head and punch him in the face.

* blonde: sorry babe, my butt looks better than yours in jeans...
brunette: you like my art?
blonde: it's just a huge hanger in a hangar...

* blonde: so what you reckon about the Redskins?
brunette: just change the team-name to Washington. call them Washington.
blonde: no more ticket-sellers at the front gate anymore.

* brunette: see that circle in back of us?
blonde: is that your compact?
brunette: it's a Stargate...


happy weekend, my babies

TOMORROW: ...oh wait! THERE IS NO TOMORROW! no really this time! it's all closed for the 4th! nothing to do on a Saturday! i had my fast-food yesterday which was weird. that burger did NOT taste good, it was all for nothing. wasted trip. why did they take the mini-tacos off the menu in the first place?...

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