CHICORY COFFEE: NEST OF NOODLES

Pope Bob: SPAGHETTI WITH PEPPERONI!!! i invented that.

Less at the steering wheel: how do you do hairpin turns again?

Pope Bob: that shouldn't be a city question. 

Pope Bob: so Part 2 of your Altarboy Initiation is gonna be...

Less: but i don't want to be an altarboy. i am however intrigued by your dream analysis, i need to analyze my dreams to see what's really going on in there. but mostly it's just to remember my dreams before i forget them.

Pope Bob: Tai told me you have to go through this rigorous internal process or no massage. and you DON'T want to miss a massage from Tai.

Less: the world economy but instead of being run on coins it's run on arcade tokens.

Pope Bob: you're a natural.

me and Jen are at Tai's bodyshop in a tandem-massage bed.

Jen R: with two holes. for our faces...

Tai: no facesitting, i can't get in trouble like that again with the licensor.

Jen: yeah we know all about our Baltimore kicker. 

Josh Allen: head? it's exercise...

me: my first and last thought each day are of you. i DREAMT that. yeah. i dreamt that i sent that very text to you. i woke and was like man it was just a dream, bummer.

Jen R: but are you awake now?.........yeah okay you're awake...

me: so i'm talking with you and we're exchanging memes. one is of Jerry Garcia dressed as Santa Claus doing a ballet leap slapping some concrete on a red-brick house.

Jen: i've seen that one!!! but that meme only exists in the dream world. yeah Jerry as Santa's all, "Slap It On."

voice message: gotta work on that lip-smacking of yours...

Mind Game.

Nishi: does BenGay work on a stubbed toe? who keeps Aleve sheets in a mason jar? no not the Blind Melon video again!!!

Jiisan Old Man Gramps: better to be sorry than safe.

swimming dinosaur: we were the coolest dinosaurs.

Nishi: i rode in the Beatles' Yellow Submarine. yeah. it was full of garbage, crumpled-up balls of paper, lost lyrics. and it smelled like fish. do women like men with a pole-vault penis?

Keith Haring, smiling: naked-man sandwich. gotta live, boys.

Myon: i coulda been Summer Sanders. after my boobs came in i became Lily Tomlin on a giant rocking chair.

Yan: this is my new Batman villainess i'm debuting here inside this whale.  

Ralph Bakshi dancing an ischemic psychedelic Lindy Hop: balloon-tits paint-art, huh? better pair it with a sperm-whale ballooning penis of sperm to keep the thing porn-equal or the ERA will be on your ass. no thank you, syringes give me hives. the cartoony Rotoscope in this movie is CREEPY.

Myon: Nishi, remember that stray dog we rescued?

Nishi: SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY, that's how Fry got his dog back. don't you DARE tell me sea-monkeys aren't real animals. poopsicle, get it?

Elon Musk: i ruined Fantastic Planet for everybody by making cuts. money tastes good. we're gonna have to live on a third planet...

Naruto: this is what happens when you have sex, your Naruto eyes turn the color of Vaporwave.

Summer Sanders: this is actually pretty cool, the Olympic sport of air-swimming, swimming in the air. i was Judy Jetson for Halloween...

Beck: be a free loser.

Yan: my dream man likes Louise Belcher.

water strider: Mr. Miyagi's favorite insect.

mom: milk builds bones, chocolate milk builds diabetes. see? milk mixed with orange juice is good.

the Boogiepop Phantom sound tone...

so that's where the Lost plane and Saving Private Ryan tank went...

Nishi: ah, that Paranoia Agent blue sky!!! i feel stable now.

worn by: Worm Boy!!!

was that a suicide? the blood on the TV screen there.

Rocky: just focus on The Rocky Horror Picture Show...

Astrodome: not famous for Nolan Ryan, famous for Brewster McCloud.

Jen R: ...

profile pic: not puerile pic.

kush: when you like a comment from a decade ago.

JG Quintel: i'm not James from Big Time Rush...

Leonard Cohen: when is Dustin Hoffman playing me?...

Stanley Cup Finals: Canada vs. crazy

President Trump: remember, there's always the MUTE button.

Kissing the Pink "One Step": hey mister hey mister...

Kryten singing: hey Lister hey Lister...

Lister: i'm finally famous for music, didn't involve my guitar but whatevs.

Rimmer: kissing the pink? perfect for us loser lads. please don't ruin Red Dwarf by saying it's an incel show...

Kieran Culkin: i got the Oscar before the most famous boy-face in America?!!!...

Michael Weiss: i actually DID read all the books behind me...

Jack Draper: imagine Federer with a British accent.

Roger Federer: isn't that my accent already?...

Jon Hamm: wait the vodka was onion water? that's fucking disgusting!!! that makes me HURL!!! no wonder i always had that surly scowl on my face on the Mad Men set.

Vaseline Cocoa Butter: what ambrosia was on Mount Olympus.

Senzu beans: marbles...

Suzy Lu: have a Burger King. you may be able to regrow your teeth in the future...

Kakashi wearing  a Burger King paper crown: please, i'm eating.

Steejo: i need that, woman, all my teeth were knocked out doing all that kickboxing i had to do to impress you...

dementia: every day is a terrible adventure.

Jules Smith: snogging is kissing that lasts because it's a European contract with the lips. snogging has gravitas, snogging means love. snogging is the kissing you do at a town-hall meeting discussing a zoning dispute.

Susan Earl: i'm a giantess, macrophilia and all that. but it's really my husky voice.

Motoko Kusanagi: damn, i got a new one.

Less: the only bad thing is the traffic.

Pope Bob waves around his magic wand.

Less: as long as don't wave around your dick.

Pope Bob: abracadabra and GHETTOBLASTER!!!

Jesus descends from the heavens wearing a backwards baseball cap and wrench. Jesus makes quick work of Less's black taxi, transforming it into a giant Say Anything-style boombox.

Pope Bob: see? this stereo will spit out bad techno from the 2000s and you'll see the flock at St. Peter's SCATTER like a Bleach sword, CLEAR with a quickness, clear out like Sunday Mass at the plaza.

Less: this isn't fun anymore.

Pope Bob: i know, driving is only fun when you're 16 and about to pass the exam to get your license.

Less: don't remind me. i thought i'd be the boy with his arm in the cookie jar for life.

Pope Bob: driving after about Age 20 is a chore.