* Lilah Fear: i don't fall on all my jumps cos of my name. i wear all black tho, goths have a grand tradition of ice-skaters, we hate the sun.
* Rachel Bright: i did NOT copy the Berenstain Bears!!! that's BerenSTAIN Bears!!!
* Ay Young: no i'm not Paul Goodloe's son.
Goody Paul Goodloe: but you did go to Berkeley like me.
* i'm puttin it out there right now: trade the final season of Ted Lasso for a third season of Vicious...
* Michael Keaton: that was me the Depression farmer in the Starship "Sara" video. in the comics Bruce Wayne sported a mustache.
* Julie Pitt: not Jolie
* phone professor: no chance of a student affair this way. "Obscene Phone Caller" by Rockwell came out 37 years ago. these grades don't count.
Kurt Cobain: people call me spooky and gloomy but i was actually Christmasy with all the plaid i wore.
* Dell APEX
- no design flaws here, our conveyor-belt factories are all inspired by Pink Floyd's "High Hopes"
- and the woman was Elyse Keaton's work friend who made a pass at tried to seduce a bearded Michael Gross known as Steven one night late-night at the office when just one overhead ceiling light was working
* IBM TV
believe it or not this is not an ad for Peloton
* Call of Duty
Tom Brady: yeah i won the NFL MVP in 2080. but it's not that revolutionary, people live longer these days. and football isn't a sport anymore.
* Ford innovation
Phoenix: in 30 years ALL cars will be electric. is the future scary? no, this comforts me cos FINALLY the real world is starting to look like Tron...
* Bud Light Seltzer
we did retro like the '90s and drilling a hole in the girl's showers like the '80s
John Hughes: ...
John Waters, smiling: the correct grammar is mens' room.
* Mariano Rivera: this proves i can be a GREAT natural funny vibrant actor even with a heavy accent.
woman: this is so sad, i bought one of those cool circle lights but not to be an influencer, it was for my damn boring job interview!!!
* Target traditions
George Huang: that's me!!! that's my family!!!
happy weekend, my babies
TOMORROW: McRib and Signature Sauce, nuff said