Friday, November 5, 2021




* Lilah Fear: i don't fall on all my jumps cos of my name. i wear all black tho, goths have a grand tradition of ice-skaters, we hate the sun.

* Rachel Bright: i did NOT copy the Berenstain Bears!!! that's BerenSTAIN Bears!!!

* Ay Young: no i'm not Paul Goodloe's son.
Goody Paul Goodloe: but you did go to Berkeley like me.

* i'm puttin it out there right now: trade the final season of Ted Lasso for a third season of Vicious...

* Michael Keaton: that was me the Depression farmer in the Starship "Sara" video. in the comics Bruce Wayne sported a mustache.

* Julie Pitt: not Jolie

* phone professor: no chance of a student affair this way. "Obscene Phone Caller" by Rockwell came out 37 years ago. these grades don't count.

Kurt Cobain: people call me spooky and gloomy but i was actually Christmasy with all the plaid i wore.

* Dell APEX
 - no design flaws here, our conveyor-belt factories are all inspired by Pink Floyd's "High Hopes"
 - and the woman was Elyse Keaton's work friend who made a pass at tried to seduce a bearded Michael Gross known as Steven one night late-night at the office when just one overhead ceiling light was working

believe it or not this is not an ad for Peloton

* Call of Duty
Tom Brady: yeah i won the NFL MVP in 2080. but it's not that revolutionary, people live longer these days. and football isn't a sport anymore.

* Ford innovation
Phoenix: in 30 years ALL cars will be electric. is the future scary? no, this comforts me cos FINALLY the real world is starting to look like Tron...

* Bud Light Seltzer
we did retro like the '90s and drilling a hole in the girl's showers like the '80s
John Hughes: ...
John Waters, smiling: the correct grammar is mens' room.

* Mariano Rivera: this proves i can be a GREAT natural funny vibrant actor even with a heavy accent.
woman: this is so sad, i bought one of those cool circle lights but not to be an influencer, it was for my damn boring job interview!!! 

* Target traditions
George Huang: that's me!!! that's my family!!!

happy weekend, my babies

TOMORROW: McRib and Signature Sauce, nuff said

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