notes:
* Cal and Stanford tied at halftime...because of course they are...
Paul Bunyan: first time ever The Big Game is being played on a Friday.
John Henry: give me back my axe! don't try to pigeonhole me with my hammer!
Kurt Cobain: why play football for an axe? why play football at all? if you're gonna play for an axe that was once lost in the woods, play for my guitar!!!
* this year the John Lewis Christmas advert is a symphony of animation styles...and substance...well substances anyway...
* there are at least 8 songs and or adverts with "Give A Little Love" in their title
(looking at you, Target)
* okay, yellow football: that portends that Cal will win the game...
* Skins: Anwar's origin story
Dev Patel: i got Skins with no prior acting experience. now i win Oscars. life, huh?...
* pigeon: yeah mate, i know this looks all heartwarming with this heart around my beak but actually this is keeping my beak shut! help!
pigeon: all this holiday stress got my eyes all crusted over...
* best friend: Mary Poppin's origin story...never knew she had glasses......explains her motivation...
* girl: WHOA! WHAT THE FUCK!
Dev: if i say bad words in my household i go to hell.
girl: i'm from an atheist household, we do up Christmas like a motherfucker
Dev: it's alright tho, cos there are many hells...
* Dev: did we just turn into Claymation!?
girl: nah, this is our true form, the human thing was a phase...
* snowman: mate i appreciate the sentiment but you just gave me a balloon made out of my flesh...
* snowman: WHOA these rooftops look a little too eerily like the Attack on Titan rooftops...
TOM from Toonami: last season you oily motherfuckers!!!...
* animation inker: nobody appreciates hand-drawn animation anymore.
Fred Flintstone: remember when square tires were funny? here's a snow heart-shaped tire to remember the Flintstones by. when the Seth MacFarlane deal fell through we had to eat Dino...
* man answering the stoop: wait, rose? honey i swear i got you rose for Christmas! it's Macy's fault for making you wait!!!
man: look i know we've had our issues, snowman. we used to be good neighbors but last Christmas was the ski trip and the threeway. your wife's got small snowball-sized tits but i like them small!...
* wife: i love this Snowman bobblehead i keep on top of the refrigerator......i'm not into sports, we just have fun with our neighbors...
* bald neighbor: why you peepin'!? i'm not naked!
man: your head is. what's the tea?
bald bloke: it's actually not tea, it's London Fog coffee...
man: um, why are you reading Hair Trend 2024 magazine?...
* man: NO it's a giftwrapped snake...
* bald bloke: my house couldn't afford an obscene display of bright-as-fuck Christmas lights this year.
man: even if they could all the snow would have shorted them out...
* bald bloke: this JOKE was so funny i farted in the bathtub! i made a ginger presentable to society by giving him Flock of Seagulls heart-shaped hair!
man: what's the joke?
bald bloke: Trump thinks he won the election...
* Steven Universe heart as the star atop the Christmas tree!
Rebecca Sugar: kiss my grits. put sugar in your grits. i ain't doing that damn cartoon again, do you know how much work that was!
* Mordecai: after Regular Show folded, i did what any millennial has to do these days: i became a DJ...
* Rigby: why i gotta dance and ballet around in this butterfly costume tho?
Mordecai: remember? you're trying to relive your past from before Eileen dumped you during the Christmas performance of that opera...
* Mordecai: and now we're reliving that Trump-supporter uncle character from Steven Universe who rode WWII-era planes. see this character is quickly becoming old-hat...
* woman on bus: here, i fixed your glasses. magic, not old obtuse Russian magic mind you, just because i'm an old woman wearing this babushka scarf around my head don't make me a Russian spy...
girl: oh it's that bird from those commercials that keeps telling me to get my glasses fixed!
owl: i had a job before the Rockefeller tree scandal...
* bus driver: NEXT STOP...TOOTING...TOOTING NEXT STOP...
happy holidays and weekend, my babies
TOMORROW: we gotta go to Dennys, right? it's the only free open weekend that's left on the calendar this entire fugging, austria year! i've had the Rudolph pancake but i'm gonna go sight-unseen-like Riker to the Dennys and look at the menu brand-new-to-me to see if they got any new holiday flavors for those pancakes. and then the usual red potatoes and club sandwich.........peppermint syrup, just a suggestion, Dennys...
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