there is no more delicious word to pronounce in the English language than Cluedo.
1. what is the future of dating? an Instagram post i came across recently perfectly sums it up in a nutshell:
it was simply a bivalved picture, one on the left and one on the right. the one on the left read Courting in the '80s and showed a Dilbertesque man by his computer. the one on the right read Courting Now and showed same Dilbertesque man getting his penis sucked behind his computer by some one or what looked like the office ficus.
2. do you usually wake up with an erection? it's the only indicator i have that i'm still alive. once the happiness dissispates, i realize i gotta get that thing down, so i tamp it down under my sheets with a gentle prodding from my beach sandal. and then of course i get a hard knock on my breakfast door from my neighbor. he criticizes me for rooming-and-boarding Indians at my place cos he said he saw a teepee early this morning when he was binocularsing through my window searching for robin-breast nests. yes, he's THAT kind of neighbor. then we get into a scuffle on Hollywood Blvd over how it wasn't my cock he saw but a Titan and he complains that he thought i could get away with using a reference an old geezer like him wouldn't get but he does indeed get it cos he's a fan of Attack on Titan and that sappy slowy 3rd Intro doesn't fit with the darkness of the anime and i counter with,
"how can you NOT like Hyde? his songs are so beautiful, so heartaching so heavenly rending romantic they break the glass of human hearts. why does he get made fun of so much, i don't get it, is it jealousy? he pronounces the Englsih words fine. you'd get emotional on that 3rd Intro too if you read the manga."
that shut him up till tomorrow morning...
3. what is your most bizarre talent? CLICK HERE, RIGHT HERE AT THIS LINK
hello there, my real name is Whis. i'm an Angel. at your service, i have no business hours cos i'm an Angel. i like my blue skin, makes me different, stands me out. contact me anytime at this blog cos i'm bored cos i'm an Angel. life really is that easy.
4. do you prefer the people in your life to be simple or complex? i prefer simple salt-of-the-earth farmers for my good people who till the land from sunup till sundown and ONLY yield wheat crops full of complex carbohydrates.
5. are you simple or complex? take a look at the human eye. (get it? take a look, ha) for all the insane immense complexity of the human eye---and the human eye is in fact the most complicated organism ever devised, all those tiny blood vessels have to strewn just right and the glass is made of delicate cobwebs from the bumblebee---it is meant to collate the universe together for us into one simple mathematical equation. i'm talking about the third eye of course, not your two eyes. i just boinged your two eyes with my two fingers Three Stooges-style but you were smartly wearing glasses. it was a peace-sign i swear.
bonus: tell us a riddle.
a bird flew to the perch of Superman's large shoulder and said, "a flying shame what happened to that girl."
Superman: what?
bird: birds of a feather, they always come in threes. do you know what they call this panel? Time Flies When You're Having Fun. what's black and white and red all over?
Superman shakes his sizeable head with the curly q in front.
bird: *smh looking down below* tomorrow morning's newspaper.
Superman was on a perch of sorts, too, that ledge in that famous scene where he talks down a girl contemplating suicide. so, yeah, that wasn't the right moment for a joke. Superman stopped being a superhero from that moment on, he removed the makeup from his face, straightened out his sweaty brow, and retired to become a normal citizen in the vein of like what would have happened if the Joker never became the Joker, he'd be just some dude on the street telling dad jokes.
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