THE SCHOOL CAFETERIA THAT NEVER WAS: SPAGHETTI COMBINED

 

Jen R: wait, I recognize that woman under the damp shower cap.

me: the unch lady? all lunch ladies look the same, it's the dull lighting in all grey school cafeterias.

Jen: no it's Kody Cobain!!!

Kody CnainL the gig is up, she says spitting a fly out of her mouth.please don't tell Kurt her IPM here.

JenL your;e the punch lady?

Kody: I can be ingocnitp here. be valued for my food, not y name. but I'm gonna lose y hob.

Kurt: why?

JodyL before I CLS take a PSAT to SVA key life one worry for the kids mu spaghetti is slipshod with the whites and the reds o top, plain as day.

Kory: a plain plane, there soft Abe a way to make it spicy.

<r. pibb: actually a bettrtastin cherry cola than Cherry kat Coke.

James Van ER Beek: well, IL waiting for Katoe Vioutroc to arrive here so we can have that sex ream.

Flo so River IL dance e won't me, Jim, it;s all over now!!!

Katie Viuicl I think it's time I go back to Tdoay. it;s okay for men to cry.........REAL tears...

James Vam De BeekjL when I cry it;s more like a puppy coughing. I actually looked good Ina  eyes Sderosn kids trace...

Bud VoirtL u was he Es Ddersn vibe before Ed Anderson...

St Drel there would be no r Dre without ark Seuss.

Rollie Wesen enters Jacques Pepin's house and takes a wing at Jacques's mantel with his baguette.

Rollie Wesen: you French faggot.

Jacques Pepin: come on, man, that was my menagerie. 

Sylvia Plath: you made me cry the same tears TWICE!!!

Jacques: you shattered my tiny little glass mongoose.

Rollie: i don't get it, is mongoose your signature dish?

Jacques: sure, you never heard of mongoose l'orange?

Boyz n the Hood: nothing;l boefr than those fine-ass movie.

Elka Raducanu: that;s it?

Bros Blver; gimme a break ma'am, they it me Ina tiny jail cell and threw away the key, I had no probably my penis shrubs from fear.

ice sprinter: shells bleeding.........time...

Dad Barefoot l skeleton soldiers VSDSH into a nice soft foam spongy Ed janitress at the end of their tin. barefoot and pregnant...

Chloe KimL as I go through the undulations g  half Pope run, i picture muster being with yells Garrett, ya feel me, aldose?

Katharine Wort HP: watch,m yes, IPM a good watch, you can tell from my white hair, IPM a witch that deals what the nervous sure, with e Altoona of thought not cheap spells.

House of LianL now that th ton accent is fading, are you able to understand it song :Jum Di8ndl now?...

auris ml ot on intuitive when you have a flagpole scene were he two Chua Ayers are inside but the San Eros a the Mae time...

Jacques Pepin: look, let me show you.

Kody Cobain: oh wow, i got a real casanova in my life for the first time.

Jacques: a casanova MUST have an accent. and be an adventurer NOT in his hometown.

Bud Cort: and wear a Bud Cort coat.

James Van Der Beek: and have James Van Der Beek hair, James.

Kurt Cobain: we need help with the spaghetti, Jerry.

Jacques: right. so instead put ALL the ingredients in a big glass bowl.

Morgan from that cooking cook: notice how all the ingredients are in glass fingerbowls, that's so the home audience can see the food!!!

Kurt: do it for the kids, Pepe!!!

Jacques Pepin: right. high school kids? well combine the dark-green basil leaves from my frontyard garden and the shaved goatsmilk cheese and the honey peppercorn and the sauce, FOLD the sauce into the noodles so you're left with a BIG-ASS BALL, a spaghetti ball sprinkled with stuck Roman cheese.

Kody: i'm gonna serve THAT BALL at lunch to curry the kids' favor.

kids: we want curry.

Jaques: the only drawback to your snack is your bowls are gonna be messy...

Jacques Pepin: and once again i prove that a Frenchman does Italian cooking better!!!