SCATTERGORIES!!!
1. when and how did you discover your passion for ___?
my passion for writing has always been in me, i just never saw it. it was a gift handed down to me by my untimely late beloved dearly-departed dad and his typewriter briefcase. but a sad thing happened on the way to the Forum: Kobe tributes. one day i was bored and popped open the briefcase, the three-digit triptych trip rote silver-rotor lock keypass was the same combination as my stanky P.E. locker at school i was hookying from. inside: one passionfruit, all seeds...
2. how has ___ changed your sex life?
the internet? it's a double-edged sword. on the one hand it's all fake and ether and nothing on the internet is real or has any semblance to an actual lived human life...and yet WITHOUT the internet i wouldn't have met the coolest people i know......and some cool celebrities who are just like we regular people...
3. what is something unique you do to ___ your ___?
it's all in the trick i mean wrist: how to turbocharge your gum: add water to it. it works. take your bigass wad of chewed dried desiccated gum with your vampyre bitemarks in it with no more flavor you scraped off your Keds and run it under the school-brick drinking fountain while the monsignor isn't looking......voila! instant return to rootbeer flavor...
4. what is the craziest ___ you've eaten while ___?
the craziest WAP i've eaten while under was down in Australia. see i was nervous around doctors, even when i brought my Mad Libs to the waiting room. so a female friend suggested to me to see a female doctor cos maybe i'd open up more. they're more gentle, she assured me. so i get there to my Woman Australian Practitioner and sure enough she was right! i closed my eyes as my hand is gently guided by her into the fishtank. the water is cold and sloshing. all the little biter fish surround my fingers and begin nibbling, it's such a peppermint sensation like little kisses all around my knuckles. before i knew it the exam was over. i love doctors now!!!
BONUS: is there such a thing as "too much information"? when?
Matthew McConaughey's dad died while having sex with his mom...
2 comments:
That's how I want to die. Just not with HIS mom. With some girl that is thirty years younger than I am.
bathwater: lol
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