Friday, February 9, 2018

FROZEN-PUCK DIPLOMACY


learned:

* false alarm........................so far........................that curling controversy has kept me up nights

* when this commercial first came out, the Earth-destroying meteor instagram emoji hadn't been out yet.

* the Revelation will be televised

* i tried to find a Super Bowl Commercial from last week for this but there just weren't any good ones.

* be sure to take that oil, you're gonna need to grease EVERYTHING.

* if you put junk in the laundry basket where will you put your laundered clothes?

* water, large bananas...

* that oil painting is a van Gogh original. rare, one of a kind. he predicted this in the painting as you can see. no one listened to him back then cos he only had one ear.

* Triple A estimates that the way most fatalities occur during the Apocalypse is from car crashes trying to get away from the Apocalypse, not the Apocalypse itself.

* ginger woman: we have more room! do we have any kids?

* ginger woman: i'm bringing the clothes! and the passports!
Rob Morrow: why'd you only take the suits and the dresses? are we absconding Bond villains?

* ginger woman: empty bottle of medicine on display sadly on our bathroom sink.
Rob Morrow: that's my hand cream.
ginger woman makes the Jenna Marbles face.
ginger woman: Jenna Marbles is married now. you gotta move on.

* Rob Morrow: did you save my video games!?
ginger woman: yes. why are you ripping our flatscreen from its wires roots!?
Rob Morrow: the video games are useless without a tv!

* ginger woman: COFFEE MAKER!!!
Rob Morrow: you really don't need to get more awake.

* ginger woman: sweep up my stolen jewelry.
Rob Morrow: oh yeah, we are Bond villains, forgot. what about this rare van Gogh of the Trojan Horse?
ginger woman: that's like saying you're the smartest horse.

* ginger woman: PILLOW!
Rob Morrow: i use your tits for my pillow.
ginger woman: RED BALL!
Rob Morrow: why is this ball so big?
ginger woman: it's my yoga ball i sit on.
Rob Morrow: but all i see when you do yoga is you sitting, not this ball. oh, now i get it, i knew there was a reason i married you.

* Rob Morrow: which one in the family plays golf?
ginger woman: i bought those clubs as insurance in case you ever get out of line.

* Rob Morrow: wait, the car won't start!
ginger woman: is it a Tiguan?
Rob Morrow: yes.
director: cut.
Rob Morrow: the thing just died. right when we needed it the most.

* ginger woman: is the Navigational Computer up and on and running and working?
Rob Morrow: still updating. these updates will take 24 hours to load.
ginger woman: we literally don't have 24 hours to wait. i'm not just being my usual impatient self.

* ginger woman: TOILET PAPER!
Rob Morrow: use your hand. i got hand cream.
ginger woman: JUICER!
Rob Morrow: the only juicer i need is you. you get my juices flowing. you're my juicer.
ginger woman: i was talking about my vape.

CLICK HERE, RIGHT HERE AT THIS LINK

happy weekend, my babies. root for the home country. what i mean is, root for South Korea. i'm excited for the new events. which i understand are exactly like the old events just done in teams.







2 comments:

Jules said...

Do you think Jenna Marbles pulls her face to her husband? And does he pull the Solomita face? *)

the late phoenix said...

they call each other otter. I try to stay away from high-profile youtube romances, my sweet, they depress me

*)