Friday, July 3, 2015



* man: i'll have this.
woman: i'm married.
man: no, the flowers. why are you banging on your keyboard there?
woman: piece of junk won't work for shit.
man: PCMatic.

* woman: PCMatic?
man: PCMatic.
woman: ..............
man: PCMatic solves all your problems.
woman: um sir, you can't touch my register.
man: with just one click PCMatic makes it all run like mucus.

* woman: wow, amazing.
man: it's all stored in the cloud. do you have anything stored in the cloud?
woman: just all my nude pics.
man: checking............yep, there they are. PCMatic just made them go out all over the internet faster.

* woman: thanks. the flowers are on the house.
man: they're fake flowers, i'm allergic, i get hay fever something serious.
woman: what's for lunch? an actress's gotta eat.
man: craft services had some meatloaf but i sneezed all over it earlier. wanna go out?
woman: sure, let me get my husband in the other room.
man: oh, menage. okay, my wife won't mind.
woman: yes one day i hope to manage this dump.
man: using your register now outfitted with the new, i just hacked into your company's overseas systems and bought this dump. i'm your new boss now. impressive, huh? by the way, you can't give away flowers for free, that's no way to run a business.

* man: by the way, who's your husband?
woman: Donald Trump.
man: oh. i'm also running for President.


happy weekend

No comments: