Friday, December 22, 2017



* they say this one lacked their usual magical spark.

* remember when was the ONLY place to find a job? ah, the '90s. for the record, i never found a job on

* don't drop that book! you'll need it later!

* imagine if the kid had a soccer blanket. Wayne Rooney would be under the bed.

* kid: Jim Henson, is that you?
Jim Henson: you know my name?

* y'know all kids don't write their Ns backwards, that's a stereotype.

* pink earmuffs, right on, the movement is growing.

* wear a crown. no wait, copyright.

* kid: so are you like Morrissey?
Moz: well we both have one yellow ball.

* kid: yo man do a jheri curl.
barber: ...

* so the world is like that poster on the wall?...

* Wayne Rooney's dad: mad goalie.
father: my kid's a narcoleptic, okay?
Wayne Rooney's dad: he's a drugs cheat?
father: his sports hero is that goalie who slept through the World Cup.

* father: were you tied to the goalie-post again?
kid: *nods*
father: my boy! making friends wherever he goes!

* kid: *writing* i want an orange...
Santa: your handwriting sucks.

* Electronic Battleship is for wimps. real men made the sinking explosion sounds with their mouths.

* Moz: you missing a sock?

* yep yep, high-five to the father, we see you

* Moz: Happy Christmas, kid. i left you my brown ball of trash.

* kid: it's a black hardboiled egg? not cool, man.
Moz: this is like Her but more creepy.

* kid: it would have been more emotional if you died in outer space. or never existed. or existed only in my heart.
Moz: i'm here to sell toys.


merry christmas, my babies

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