CYBER COURTSHIP

learned:

* modern love. don't question it or you're a grandpa.

* woman: hi.
man: you think i have big hands?
woman: i like your white shoes.
man: will we EVER get to that post-racial world i keep reading about online.
woman: sit next to me.
man: always the seat-filler, never the star.
woman: i like your stylus. it's nice and small.
man: *sigh*

* woman: AGHHH! MY EYES ARE BURNING! AND WE'RE ON GRASS! THE GRASS WILL CATCH ON FIRE!!!
man: i just wanted to draw a hopeful Reading Rainbow star-trail thing!

* woman: you paying for these drinks, right?
girl: i'm 12. i'm your niece. i look older but that's why you're my babysitter.

* man: watch the drawing on my crotch, you made me sensitive about that.
woman: i have a confession to make: i have extremely long rubbery arms that can squeeze the life out of your body when i hug you to death.
man: being loved is the greatest way to die. i'm kinky like that. you like being choked?
woman: no.

* man: whatcha doing?
woman: staring at the raindrops on a pane of New York cab window in a heavy, miles-away gaze like in every movie.
man: see whom i'm drawing to kiss?
woman: who's the other woman? are you cheating on me? good, i can go back to being infused and ponderous.

* woman: i think.................i look like Daniella Monet.
man: i look like.........................nevermind.

* woman: he let me shove him, that's the sign i was looking for.

* man: did you send it?
woman: this jungle music is distracting.

* man: who dis?
woman: that Paperclip mascot.

* man: i think i love you, too.
woman: that made my head snap back.
man: remember, i said i think, don't plan the wedding just yet.

* woman: the magical NYC streetlamps through the rain have shone light sparklets which have turned into the shape of little golden hearts. like in every movie.

* woman: has your Samsung exploded yet?
man: can't.................mention....................the name of the.................product

* i have the sudden urge to go out and buy Similac. no i'm not the father.

CLICK HERE, RIGHT HERE AT THIS LINK

happy weekend, my babies. why does everyone in a youtube comments section feel the need to type what their phone is?...