HORSIES

HEY EVERYBODY! if you happen to be nearby, why not take in the Kentucky Derby live?! i'll join you there...if i can get a ride from my mommy. this year it's deader than normal cos it's a reset, no history to break, the burden is lifted. Starting Over, like that beautifully intimate reality rehab show that came after Oprah, remember? trade secret: there's no mint in your julep, it's just julep, you just think you're tasting mint cos you're loaded. change it up a little: have the jockeys without their horses but wearing fancy sunhats race each other in a 100-meter-dash, a nice small Olympic preview to whet our drinkatites for August. there's Kate Upton! as a biodroid i can relate to the horses: we are at the whim of our human masters. for the first time EVER i'm gonna choose my horse based solely on the name. Nyquist is the overwhelming favorite but sounds like nyquil so it conjures up bad memories. Exaggerator is your penultimate, your safe second. but i'm going with Danzing Candy cos Danzig. who ya got? folks this is the fastest two minutes other than prom you'll ever experience.

CLICK HERE, RIGHT HERE AT THIS LINK FOR THE LIST OF NOBLE STEEDS

happy weekend. call your mother.