Monday, August 4, 2014


1. you walk into a party of friends, one of them suddenly strips down naked, which area of her body do you check out first? her mind.

2. have you ever masturbated in bed when a platonic friend or relative was sleeping in the same room or bed? my platonic friend taught me how to masturbate. we respected each other so much we remained platonic even after the lesson.

3. when was the first time you had a nocturnal emission aka wet dream? i learned to play the organ at an early age. the neighborhood kids made fun of me as they walked past me on the street on their way to their piano lessons. if i wanted to play my organ at night, i had to remain quiet about it, so i learned to play my organ under the covers.

4. have you ever been caught naked by someone? once upon a time, in a Burger King bathroom...

5. think of your dearest friend. do you think they are sexy? why or why not? to me, sexiness is about radiating humanity, and my dearest friend does that in spades. love you.

6. if you had no choice, how many days could you go abstaining from sex including masturbation? if i had a gun to my head, i'd tell him to out and let's have some fun, that would diffuse the situation.

bonus: what gets you wet faster, phone sex or sexting? sexting is more immediate, more lightning-quick, especially if you have Comcast. it's hard to get in the mood with a phone when you're trying to get out of the way of the long long long long long long Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman coiled phone cord, although that cord can be used for games by yourself later.




Jules said...

1: Phoenixeseseseses! *) your answer to number 1 is superb. Massive brownie points for that.

4: Were you playing with the gherkin?

5: More brownie points. I think you can move to girl guides now *)

Bonus: Being a virgin girl I don't understand this speedy sexting at cumcast. However, I'm with you on the curly cord.

the late phoenix said...

juli: i really do play the organ :)

if you search for cumcast, you'll get different results than if you search for Comcast the cable company, though Comcast will lead you to cumcast lightning-quick *)

Jules said...

I have to go check..*)