Friday, March 17, 2017

DEPP THOUGHTS


learned:

* Johnny Depp: i normally use a saw to cut this axe.

* Johnny: this isn't an original song but it's my band covering it and we're playing the Viper Room so

* Johnny: i'm not trying to be cool, these are prescription shades.

* Johnny: i need to get away. too much noise pollution in the city..............this has nothing to do with any allegations i'm trying to escape

* Johnny: which way? oil? hell no. donuts? yes, making donuts.

* Johnny: i don't know. do you, buffalo?
Buffalo: i'm a bison, get it right, hollywood.
Johnny: does my car look black to you?
Buffalo: midnight blue.
Johnny: i need to change my shades. where do you roam, buffalo?
Buffalo: away from your car so i don't become a bison burger.
Johnny: i get it i get it, you are of the streets and can never escape.

* Vulture: i'm the new national bird. the Bald Eagle got rogaine and retired.

* Johnny: get that mangy mutt off my roof! i just had it carwashed by a model's tongue.

* Johnny: digging my own grave.........literally.......and figuratively....

* Johnny: this necklace of New Orleans Mardi Gras beads was given to me by the wisest shaman i know. Jack Nicholson. who's an atheist.

* Johnny: IT'S THE APOCALYPSE!
Wolf: it's just rainclouds.
Johnny: i live in Los Angeles.

* Wolf: how many earrings can a man wear before he's considered a pirate?
Johnny: that's offensive. pirates can wear guyliner, too.

* JOHNNY'S SPIRIT-WALK FEVER DREAM IN THE MAGIC DESERT, CLICK HERE

Johnny interprets it. he squats down Indian-style, pulls the roots out of a cactus and eats the prickles, strokes his chin and begins:

Johnny: the flying whale goes Free Willy on the leprechaun ass.

* Vulture: that isn't green beer. that's just bad beer...

* Johnny: you know what Sauvage means?..............sausage

CLICK HERE, RIGHT HERE AT THIS LINK

happy weekend. don't smoke too many shamrocks today




4 comments:

Jenny Baranick said...

Guyliner. Did you make that up? I love it.

the late phoenix said...

Mrs. Baranick: no, that's an old emo term. we goths don't just paint the eyes, we paint the whole face, we're cool, we're from Brooklyn and Seattle

The Purple Assassin. said...

incredible stuff. Depp has always been the kind that brings out the better in us I guess ;)

the late phoenix said...

hello there, Purple, how are you? reading back this post I thought some might get the wrong impression. I'm actually a big fan of Johnny Depp, I think he's really cool 😂

happy new season