Friday, February 23, 2018



* Agnes Obel...............googling.................wait, these music videos are starting to look familiar...............i already googled Agnes Obel before.................i just wasted two hours...............i hate when i do that

* this is the second time for Peloton and me. don't know what it is. the combination of dark-wooded atmosphere and the latest indie track stirs my emotions. i was surprisingly deeply moved by this. perhaps i shouldn't be so surprised anymore.

* mom: let's get this out the way upfront on front street. i'm hot, i'm a milf, got a hot butt, now see me for me.

* there's just something about a tumbling piano. there's no other instrument in the universe like the soft sound of a piano key. it rumbles the soul.

* mom: wait, this isn't my usual instructor. nevermind.

* mom: i really need to get rid of those grey workout pants that show. on to Lululemon!
director: you can't say another brand whilst you're on the grounds of the shoot.

* Phoenix: all these moments are whizzing by so fast i barely noticed them.
mom: i didn't, either. and they're my memories.

* husband walks past at 10:30 AM.
mom: honey? you're already home? why are you home from work so early?
husband: work? oh, comfort you later.

* husband: baby, what happened? what's wrong?
mom: i slipped on our daughter's fuzzy teddy bear again.
husband: we talked about this. please don't cry. you gotta save your tears. your tears are magic. they make the teddy bear come to life.
mom: makes it easier for me to slip. the alive teddy bear keeps sweeping my leg.

* mom: see what i'm showing the camera upclose?
director: the red Peloton tub-faucet wheel flower gear that makes the bike go faster or something?
mom: no, my enormous rock.

* mom: why are you so rambunctious?
daughter: i'm a kid.

* daughter: mommy blows bubbles!
mom: that was my allergies, sorry.
director: watch it. no other brands .

* mom: don't like those jeans either. too mom-jeans.
husband: i like them.

* mom: here we are, gathered at the dinner table. just the wives so we can gossip.
ladies: can't use the word gossip anymore.
man: i'm a man actually. my head is turned to the camera and i have a short haircut and glasses.
mom: anybody got any wives' tales on old cough remedies?
man: i do.
mom: y'all paying for the food you eat, okay? i spent my life savings on a Peloton.

* mom: i don't want to be sweating inside when it's snowing outside! i want the weather to match my heart. who am i doing this for, anyway?

* mom: they're just flowers.
daughter: how much do they cost? how much for them?
mom: they're flowers for my Valentine's Day. everyone forgot. you at least get a card at school.
daughter: i will literally have to break the bank for this. the piggybank.

* mom: we're in arrears this year.
husband: you have a pen sticking out of your ear. that's sexy.
mom: how are we gonna pay for this house when you're home early all the time?
husband: the magical bear wants me to just eat graham crackers from now on.

* mom: hold my hand. reach for my hand. okay i'll reach for yours. where's your ring?

* mom: hug me. okay i'll hug you. why does the top of our bannister have a poo emoji?

* husband and daughter: mom, we love that you work out. and you work out all your emotions. but that bike is right in the middle of the living room. makes it hard for us to play Don't Step In It.


happy weekend, my babies. better is in us. butter is in me.

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