Monday, November 14, 2016


1. what shoes would you like to fill today? it would be an honor to walk a day in your shoes.
2. what is the next big-dollar purchase you are planning to make? ticket. to get onboard whatever contraption Elon Musk is working on at the moment.
3. you have $100,000 to spend on friends. how would you spend it? give it all to Chandler Bing. he needs all the help he can get in his fight against Barney Stinson.
4. you have $5000 to spend on your significant other. how do you spend it? our nation is divided. i of course would want the lifetime supply of pancakes from Burger King. cos when you think of pancakes, you think of Burger King. also i really want to eat my meal whilst wearing that Burger King paper crown like they do in the commercial. she inevitably will want the lifetime supply of that new Subway reuben sandwich. i'll give in cos i love her. and i do want to try that reuben. even though i know that however much i think it's gonna be different this time, Subway sandwiches will never taste as good as their commercials would have you believe.
5. what is your favorite waste of time? well i used to be a twitter troll but now...

bonus: tell us about the most mischievous thing you did as a kid. there is a clear line of demarcation in my childhood: before and after i got a cassette of Nirvana's Nevermind. before i was wildly innocent. i thought people stopped making music after Mozart went crazy. y'know they took it as a warning. the first time i listened to Kurt's weary voice and those fuzzy guitars i went mad. i just never conceived that such stuff existed on the earth. before i would get punched. after i was invited to my first junior-high dance. where i proceeded when "Smells Like" came on the loudspeaker to grab the punchbowl, carry it outside the gym, and dump it on the 100m track. no records were being broken at our school. i came back in ready to herald in the era of me being a badass but no one noticed the punchbowl was missing. the bad boys and good girls were too busy making out with each other. without me. i needed a drink...



Anonymous said...

I <3 this!

the late phoenix said...

wildfire: thank you, my friend! *campfire emoji* HTMIT :)