Friday, November 11, 2016

NOT A DAY IN YOUR LIFE


learned:

* *rubs eyes* ................... *rubs eyes again* .................. (trying to stay woke)

* you will gladly lose four fingers for the Empire.

* those are large blocks of chalk. nobody goes to school anymore, they just download the wikipedia app.

* webinars are scams. how are you supposed to run off with your teacher if she's just some voice on the screen? i miss real school affairs.

* to some people, legos and gummi bears are hell.

* R.I.P. Moltar. say a few gravelly Cohen alleluias when you get on your knees tonight.

* today is my first day. today is my last day.

* new boss, same as the................wait this is different.

* can i take this moment to vehement? i just thoroughly hate when my machines don't work. i've had it all my life. all my computers never work, all my cable tvs never work, all my remote controls never work, all my keyboards 327ygrhv eqw3uryt79pjfwo

* but you need hands to waterboard.

* it's the baby from the Massive Attack "Teardrop" video! he's the last human i trust!

* i want Hugh Hefner's hands.....................................................alright maybe not

* your boss is a demon. not to fear. you are a demon.

* you will notice that we serve hot dogs. and that all of our employees' hands have four fingers missing.

* no, continue burning money on the space program. it's our only hope.

* Toucan Sam got ahold of the space weed.

* the cure for depression is to travel to outer space. where you will find the cure for depression.

* there is love in the deep web. but it's so deep it's impossible to find.

* remove your brain and go toward the hole dancing seductively like a woman.

* that's a dog in a human suit. he's kinky like that.

* warm bodies i sense are not machines that can only make money---Live "Pillar of Davidson"

* you would think the shirtless hippie of all people wouldn't waste water.

* ROLLED. FOR PIZZA THE COINS MUST BE ROLLED.

* the tragedy of the pizza-delivery boy: used for his body. not to mention he develops a repulsion for pizza.

* so as this clearly shows Michael Jackson was the man.

* if David Partridge and Jimmy Swaggart had a kid

* you just got Conned.

CLICK HERE, RIGHT HERE AT THIS LINK

relax. it's been a week. have some pink-filler hamburgers. go on a long cruise. like to another country or something. before it's too late.


2 comments:

Jules said...

The pizza boys face looks like a deep dish pepperoni. This not alone causes him to repulse pizza, seeing it as a reflection of self loathing but also to read many sci-fi books in search of the cure for depression through “The Word” But, the word never lives up to the fulfilment one seeks, but for a moment, because they are over used in Wikipedia, rendering them empty. This causes the pizza boy to go deeper than the deep dish and eat his fingers. He can’t hold his book anymore or even his Kindle. Music is the only answer for the two thumbed boy. He listens to the late Cohen "-Everybody knows that the dice are loaded -Everybody rolls with their fingers crossed." But he has no fingers because he ate them. This forces him to spiral and rage against the machine; the machine that never works. He longs for Hugh Heffner's hands…..

the late phoenix said...

exactly, mah dahlin. thankfully i don't work much so i can still enjoy pizza. pizza is like depression, it's still a cure even when it's bad. i like all pizza: pizza pizza, pizza pockets, pizza bites, and pizza ROLLS *)