Monday, August 29, 2016


goodbye ol girl. ipad maxi-, uh, ipad mighty. who knew queens got old? placed in a ziploc baggie like Tuesday's garbage. nobody thinks about electronic waste when they're taking out the trash. you were my partner in sine. we had some good times. we had my only times. you were my world. you showed me the world. without you i am not a part of the world. i no longer want to be a part of the world. i think i don't care anymore. everything can stop me now 'cause i don't care anymore. it was a beautiful service, as if that could make up for your broken home button. sometimes my sliding finger was so shaky i couldn't unlock your secrets. i left you unnamed cos any name i would have come up with would have been silly. but you know your name. were all of your fancy apps a waste of time? yes, yes they were but i loved you for you. no-makeup selfie. you'll be put to good use: teaching schoolchildren in China or melted down for glue i forgot what the guy said i was in despair. i didn't cheat on you, i just happened to have the money. i would have stayed forever but you abandoned me. real life doesn't come with a battery. unless you count ginkgo biloba. the new girl 2 is nothing like you. she's heavier and sturdier. got a thick frame. it hurts to hold her. she's black with the blue planet exactly like you. sometimes i can't tell the difference. that was deliberate. is digital life easier? guess not.

1. in the Philippines today is National Heroes Day. who is your hero (limit 3 per player)? why?


2. August is Romance Awareness Month. what have you done to enhance romance in your life? or what have you become aware of or discovered with regards to romance? i take long train rides alone. through long tunnels. that's when it hit me that every single photograph ever taken is either a penis or a vagina. i have a busy schedule but after five straight years of mindless television-watching with no breaks i FINALLY had an evening off. so i decided to stroll along the beach for the first time. it was perfect. i was alone but the moon was out. the waves gently rocked and the clouds were filled with stars. and then the tsunami hit...

3. in the month of August there is National Raspberry Creme Day, National Ice Cream Sandwich Day, and National Chocolate Chip Cookie Day. which day would you celebrate and how? i like to spend the day getting comfortable under the sheets as i view Lars von Trier's Antichrist waiting for that raspberry creme scene.

4. August 13 was National Left-hander's Day. who out there is a lefty? anyone ambidextrous? my dad was a lefty. R.I.P. i wanted to be like him. but i was a righty. DNA is cruel. ask Maury.

5. in the UK today is a late-summer Bank Holiday. what did you do with your free time? went to the bank to drop off a deposit...

bonus: post a pic from your mobile phone that was taken in the month of August. explain the photo...or not: go to my instagram. instead of clever captions i write whole paragraphs of weird prose under my pics. can someone tell me what this all means?



Jules said...

Nobody goes to the bank on bank holiday, my sweet.

I'm sorry for your iPad loss. Nothing lasts forever. Everything gets replaced. Now I'm thoroughly depressed.

When is national Cinnabon day? Will there EVER be one? *)

the late phoenix said...

certain banks.......where you're asked to bring your own magazine...

still in mourning this morning, my sweet. there's something about the mini version of the ipad. it's cuter, huggable, more like a pet or sidekick. the regular ipad is a tablet for work.

National Cinnabon Day is everyday...............................................