Friday, June 12, 2015


folks, don't worry, i got ya, all explainable, no need to panic:


* okay it's good for Africa to get some cool weather.

* lamp flying to the ceiling: just a poltergeist

* i feel so sorry for that bike messenger. on the other hand Puck the MTV bike messenger from The Real World remains a controversial figure.

* look, don't take advantage when it's raining fish. just take your selfies with them and put the fish back in the water, fishing is a sport, not breakfast. teach a man to fish as strictly a sport and not as a way to nourish himself and you'll have a skinny fisherman for a lifetime.

* still not as rare as a California hurricane. my local weatherman Jim laments daily after his broadcast each night about how he's seen everything in his area EXCEPT a hurricane, and then he looks down, and then he sheds one tear. i feel so bad for Jim. that one tear is more water than hurricane water he'll ever see in his lifetime. unless he moves.

* burning bush/tree=good, that's God right there, go ahead and talk to Him, He won't bite. be thankful YOU didn't spontaneously combust.

* the flying pig goes quack quack.

* i feel so bad for the END IS NIGH guy with the sandwich boards on him, he's just out there trying to make an honest buck selling sandwiches.

* the hyenas are laughing with you not at you.

* dogs walking their owners=that's how it should have been in the first place.

* it's not stealing a tv when you're a Catholic priest.

* that giant ferris wheel looks FUN!

* that astronaut is right now hurtling through space and will crash-land on another planet that finally has life on it, namely hot green alien women with three breaststststststs.

* Morgan Freeman's reaction after seeing the ending of this commercial: OH HELL NO!


happy weekend


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