Monday, May 9, 2016


1. May 9---today is National Lost Sock Memorial Day. how many single socks do you have cos the mate got lost? see: Douglas Adams. i'm as single as my mateless socks. but seriously, folks, i really do think all those socks that get lost eventually get found on Sesame Street and get turned into muppet stuffing.

2. this month is National Bike Month in the U.S. do you own a bike? when's the last time you rode your bike? i rode your mom's bike last night. no, seriously, i rode a bike that belonged to your mother, see above.

3. of course we all know it is Masturbation Month. how are you celebrating? chewing real good before swallowing

4. as a kid many of us would think out loud, "i won't ever be like my mom (dad)!" now that you are grown, what parent are you most like? not grown. disqualified.

5. if you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be? CLICK HERE, RIGHT HERE AT THIS LINK

BONUS: a lot of people do sexting. do you ever have sexy talk with a real phone call? do you rehearse what you are going to say or do it freestyle? no, but Commissioner Gordon calls me up on his red phone and talks dirty to me. makes me so uncomfortable some nights i haven't the will to don the cowl and leave my man cave.



Jules said...

When is it not masturbation month? *)

the late phoenix said...

Comment of the Year 2016 *)