Friday, April 10, 2015



* hunk: mind if i jaunt briskly on the beach with you?
babe: yes. i thought you were David Hasselhoff. i had it all planned out, we were gonna eat burgers and everything.

* hunk: scram, ya bother me, kid, get out of here, it's dangerous, i will save you.
babe starts to run away.
hunk: babe, i just gotta say, you have a nice ass.
babe: hey, i don't see any danger, just a nice man in professional beige slacks. did you tell me to run away just so you could scope my ass?
hunk: it's a situation where both things are true.

* babe: what's that? are you packin' a semi?
hunk: yes and i have a gun with me, too.

* hunk: you have a nice ass.
babe: so do you, pilgrim.
hunk: thanksgivingyou.

* villain: hey turkey!
hunk: NOT thanksgivingyou!

* hunk: y'know, you talk a big game but you have no throwing skills.
villain: it's hard to flip the frisbee around your body and shit when you're packin' a semi in broad daylight.

* hunk: this throw is for all those you killed. NEVER FORGET.
villain: never forget what?
hunk: i forgot.

* villain (writhing in sand): nononooooo, arggghghghghg, i'm allergic to cherry jelly!!!!!!!!!!!!!


happy weekend. The Masters is already over, so there go my two days...



AVY said...

I sometimes wish I was the sort of person that talked like this, and that I had such a man.


the late phoenix said...

avy: i know what you mean. i don't have the muscles to be a hunk.