Monday, May 6, 2013

TMIT: CURSE OF THE GIRLFRIENDLESS







1. my favorite place to masturbate is________: it's a tie between outside and all over.

2. have you ever masturbated in public? what were the circumstances? once on a trolley and once in a supermarket for this underground indie porn site. still waiting for the 45 bucks promised.

3. do you like mutual masturbation? why? yes, it makes me think she is comfortable around me, that she likes me for more than my body's penis. see, we talk Heidegger's Being And Time while i choke the chicken and she jills off...it all goes back to Time...i take 3 minutes to finish, she takes longer.

4. when was the last time you masturbated? i've been a good boy, a couple of the monks came for a home visit so i had to be on my best behavior...wait, a couple of monks came for a visit...i swear i didn't mean to type that!

5. have you ever masturbated on camera? strangely no...don't know why that is strange to me exactly, that in itself is strange...want some strange? this stuff goes great with purple drank...

6. do you like to watch people masturbate? that's...like...um...porn, right? so...

bonus: have you ever filmed yourself masturbating? would you care to share such a film via a link? absolutely, just send $45.00 to my Swiss paypal account and it's as good as yours! yeah, see, i'm still under contract with the damn company.

HEY GUYS, online friends out there, wisps, i really want a girlfriend, any advice?

CLICK HERE FOR TMI TUESDAY

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4 comments:

AtiyaLuv said...

we both got the Rhianna Picture!!! niiice!!

I am comfortable around you Phoenix! lets do this!

:)))

Silverdrop said...

Interesting answers. Perhaps we could all watch each other? :)

Juliette said...

Ok I'm going down a different tack here sweet Phoenix...and that's cos I like to flaunt the rules.

1:Outside and all over. Where outside? Curious.

2: On a trolley? A supermarket trolley? What like in the yoghurt and dairy aisle?

3:No.It reminds me of Misfits.

4: The monks came for a home visit? Hmmm.

5:Why is it strange?

6: No. It reminds me of misfits. I've said that before. Am I still here? Misfits the English programme that is awesome sauce.

Bonus: $45? Is that all? Gosh you're cheap sweet phoenix ;) Mine starts at a 70 and that's sterling.

But why do you really want a girlfriend and what qualities are you looking for?

the late phoenix said...

atiya: you, me, and Rihanna's recent nipslip in an all-out mind-meld threesome...

silverdrop: my Swiss paypal account was shut down for what they called "being shady".

juli: no, trolley as in the San Francisco trolleys...or the Mister Rogers one if you want to get hardcore about it.

i want a girlfriend 'cause, well, i kinda don't want to die alone...