Wednesday, November 21, 2012

TNH: THE SILVER LINE

*CLICKY CLICKY*
click on The Master above to eat this series whole like so much turducken
what, you thought i was gonna post a pic of Nate Silver? the election is over, finally over, it's time for the country to cum together and all that jazz. as you sit down for the Eating tomorrow, reminisce over Thanksgivings past. when i do, i think about The Twilight Zone marathons. it's true, kids too young to remember, the Twilight Zone Marathon would delightfully invade our tv screens during Thanksgiving, not Halloween like it does now shabbily on SyFy Channel. true, it does make more sense that the surreal and intelligent black and white best sci-fi serial thought-provoking show which made us scream and think is more aligned with the screaming of Halloween ghosts and not cranberry sauce, but it was tradition when i was younger, and you never buck tradiiton, at least not until you're a teenager. plus, the fact that TZ never fit in with Turkey Day was a perfect Twilight Zone episode in itself, it was strange and alluring, it didn't make sense and yet it happened every year and nobody seemed to question it, it was simply the fog of war, simply the Zone working its magic. Rod Serling is my father and of this i am finally not ashamed...oh, the stories Dad could have told me in his den with his smoking jacket on, pipe in mouth blowing away, that smoke which would eventually kill him, but before, a few tidbits and secret tales about producing television, creating quality television in those days, the good ol' days, trailblazing for science-fiction storytelling forever more, for every generation which came after, and not ending with a Moral Orel-style God talk and belt spanking and dropping of drawers and revealing of Dad's underwear, rather ending with science and boundless imagination...and cranberry sauce.
CLICK HERE, RIGHT HERE AT THIS LINK, TO MINE THE SILVER
THEN, please answer the following questions:
1. gold or silver?
2. what do you do to feel no pain?
3. what special item do you keep in a box underneath your bed?
4. would you dress up in a pilgrim outfit and hat if that's what your lover wanted?
5. Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas are completely and utterly played-out, these are three holidays which are old as dirt, boring, and just aren't getting it done anymore. come up with three new holidays which will replace the old three this time of year and describe what each holiday is all about.
HAPPY SAD THANKSGIVING GOBBLE GOBBLE FUCKING RELATIVES LARGE-ASS WOODEN OUTSIDE CROWDED TABLE NOT ENOUGH STUFFING YEARS OF ABUSE AND PENT-UP FRUSTRATION COMING OUT WITH A FEW SIPS OF WINE CAN'T CHOOSE YOUR FAMILY WHO LOST THE FUCKING REMOTE? RAN OUT OF THE SICK LUMPY MASHED POTATOES ORDER A PIZZA IS THIS ALL THAT THERE IS TO LIFE? SAD HAPPY THANKSGIVING, MY BABIES!!!
CLICK HERE FOR THE NAUGHTY HANGOUT
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3 comments:

the late phoenix said...

1. silver, fuck
2. cranberry sauce...and VANQUISH...and sleep
3. needles...to knit Crimbus mittens
4. only if we used the leftover gravy...
5. Reason Day: the family sits in front of the tv all day, watches as many adult-swim shows it can, then discusses the absurdity of each one and talks about post-post-post-modern art and adult-swim-lifestyle nihilism
Love Day: basically just a day where everyone in the blogging community comes up to my McMansion and we have an orgy. there are apples, oranges there, too, grapes, but, y'know, it's basically just an orgy
Day of Doom: near the end of the year, it's winter outside, it's snowing, it's cold, the family lights a giant blue light bulb in the middle of the living room and starts jabbering on about The End of the World and the fact that once you're dead, where will you be?

Cheeky Minx said...

I need a new clock and diary since I'm wretched late. Again!

Since we don't do the giving of thanks in this country, I want to say I'm grateful for your Love Day. I think we need to start plotting and planning now.

I love your silver line. Did you know that white can look silvery in the right kind of light? ;-)

the late phoenix said...

cheeky: i missed you terribly. doncha love that word "silvery", it so lilts off the tongue. speaking of your tongue...i'm tellin' ya, we must get together and jointly experience the WHITE, we really must before it's too late...