Monday, June 9, 2014


1. are you male, female, or other? male. i'm the other man.

2. dog or cat? One Million Cat Army Will Take Over The World ^..^ ^..^ ^..^

3. peanut butter or wasabi peas? peanut-butter-and-wasabi-peas sandwich. keep a drink nearby.

4. group midnight nude swim or mooning strangers? the doctor at my funny farm keeps telling me to join a group, get out there, make new friends. plus any chance to do an R.E.M. tribute i take. more friends, less strangers. i am a stranger to myself as it is.

5. Sneaker Pimps or IAMX? "6 Underground" is pure childhood for me, pure nostalgia arrow. just typing their name again brings back that beat in my head...

6. bologna or braunschweiger? always go with the one which sounds the coolest, which trips off your tongue, put that on your tongue, that's how i roll.

7. vanilla or kinky? so fucking kinky it's rocky road. with a cronut on the side. and i hate cronuts: worst mixing of two separate things since that weird lady did the bacon donut. that proved that bacon does not go with everything.

8. rocky road or chocolate ice cream? i'm so kinky that the second you lick me i get all scared and vanilla and shit and leave the money on the counter and run away like a bawse.

9. red M&M or green M&M? the green ones are supposed to make you horny. the red ones, like the red shirt of Tiger Woods, are supposed to make you win golf Majors. if you combine the two, you get...oh...wait...never mind...sorry about that.

10. pepsi or coke? since the first moment coke touched my lips when i was a baby, i have been a willing slave to it up until this moment now. pepsi is a fraud, traitor, and poseur. maybe if i had drunk milk, i wouldn't be a blogger...

11. Mini Cooper or Fiat Abarth? always go with the one which sounds the coolest, which rolls off your tongue, that's how i roll, and that's literally how i roll, as in how i get from place to place using a vehicle.

12. pleasure or pain? pleasure=pain=pleasure. it's not a cop-out, it's the truth. can't know pleasure without pain, for some pleasure is pain, pain is pleasure. can't know light without the darkness. can't see the stars without the night sky. the duality of life. pale blue dot. Cosmos isn't getting a Season 2: now that's pain.

bonus: either participate in the London World Bike Naked Ride or Japan's Festival of the Steel Phallus: as much as my soul IS Japan and all that it stands for, i gotta go with the bike ride simply because you are sure to awkwardly bump into your soul mate there whether you like it or not...




Hedone said...

Flippin' funny and strange. Loved your answers.

- H

Juliette said...

'Ite trip hop 90's boy!

I can highly recommend naked cycling in London. Besides, there's loads of Japanese there too so it would be a win/win for your soul.

the late phoenix said...

H: thanks. i like funny strange more than funny ha-ha, but that's just me.

juli: my soul hasn't had a win in three years. it hasn't had a win/win in a decade. let's go! let's bike! vamanos :)

Sammi said...

#9 totally cracked me up :-)

Happy TMI!

the late phoenix said...

sammi: Rory is the man now. i still say Caroline gets a Major before he does post-jilting...