Monday, October 15, 2012

TMIT: CAN A MAN AND WOMAN TRULY JUST BE FRIENDS? THE ANSWER, MY JUST FRIEND, IS BLOWING IN THE BLOW

SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE JUST FRIEND! banjo, music, sweet songs for the morn, that's what i meant, strings being plucked and sucked, your strings being plucked...
1. have you ever had a friendship with someone where you secretly (or not so secretly) desired them? yes, and that is why i blog. desire guides me, enters me, controls me, i type because i desire, i desire to have the one that got away all those years ago, each word i type is precious, for it could be my last, the blow could decide to work deadly on me this time, so i hope with each breath and with each word typed that i reach my beloved, the woman i desire the most, the blogger, the soul mate, my missing piece, my friend, *puts fist on heart*
2. are you prone to suspicion, jealousy, or insecurity when your partner spends time with an attractive close friend without you? why? no partner, no friends, no attractive close friends, though strangely, i do have a pen-pal buddy who is attractive but not in the conventional sense, old bingo ladies desire him from afar, that's it, that's his only demographic. also, he's a he, so there's no sexual tension when we pen-pal each other, though we did fuck in college. i'm suspicious, jealous, and insecure about my writing style, i feel that it's just not good enough.
3. has a previously-platonic friendship ever blossomed into a sexual relationship? no, damnit, i wanted it to, if it had, you wouldn't now know me, i'd be in the Riviera blowing my winnings on blow and gash. then again, i wouldn't be as sensitive to my own feelings and other bloggers' feelings as i am now, so, y'know, everything happens for a reason. again, i don't like to rehash the whole blonde drama student episode in my life over and over, if you really want to read about it, it's in a post here at this blog somewhere, near the start of this blog, a year or so ago, something like that, i can't tell time anymore, one week ago might as well be one decade ago, all the years just kinda melt together for me into one black line, i still write my checks "1995", it's still time for me to check out the new episode of DUCKTALES on channel 7 at 3PM this afternoon in the Disney Block.
4. have you ever remained close friends with an ex-lover? hello? is anybody out there? i'm dying over here. no, no, all of my ex-lovers hate me, they say i ruined their lives, and they are correct. i'm out of crackers, i need my munchies, the doctor says i need my salt crackers or i get imbalanced, need to maintain that salt level, turns out the pills he prescribed never achieved what a few salt crackers could...
bonus: have you ever developed feelings for a friend with benefits? how did it develop, unfold, resolve? i'll say it for the umpteenth time: the Perfect relationship between a man and a woman is the friend with benefits route, both parties get the sex, and both remain friends 'cause they don't have to marry or go steady and put up with all that wedding/marriage drama and relationship drama. trust me, it's true, i've learned from experience, would i lie to you? this works, burn all of your other self-help books in a small fire on your front lawn and listen to me, this is real, it works. do people say "go steady" anymore? back in the '50s you say? again with the time thing...
CLICK HERE FOR TMI TUESDAY
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12 comments:

Twisted Angel said...

Ok WTF is wrong with the girl on the left in the next to last picture. Screwed up photoshop much damn.. I have never seen the movie just friends but I apparently need to now. One lucky lady whomever she is.

Shockgrubz said...

Where I came from, instead of 'going steady' it was 'seeing each other', which I believe perpetuates a jealous mind-set by insinuating that if you just look at another woman, you're cheating.

I've the same insecurity issues with my writing. Don't worry, we're all this way. But different.

Unknown said...

As usual, your photo spread absolutely cracked me up! Gotta love those facial expressions...

Are you tending more towards online than real life for a relationship then? There is a lot to be said for online! but nothing beats getting out there and getting your heart broken by real, live people!

:*

~Kazi xxx

Unknown said...

pass me the crackers, this is going to be a long night.... you said much but told me little.... slowly, slowly you share phoenix.... come to Brisneyland, I shall COAX the information out of you!
X
Allys

the late phoenix said...

twist: whoa, i didn't notice that the first time around, nice catch :)

shockgrubz: that reminds me, it's time for my evening shock treatment

kazi: tell me about it...i'd be okay with online fucking, but a certain someone needs to approve my comment...

allys: i just won the Super Bowl...and i'm going to Brisneyland!!!

AtiyaLuv said...

the photos are GREAT!! I love the movie Just friends..haha

and your answers as always leave me wondering!
aaarrgg!!!!

besitos querido!!!

Anonymous said...

I love your writing style, always makes me laugh, however intentional or unintentional it may be!

I loved the Ducktails, you can still watch it?! I had no idea.

FWB, it is an awesome way to share time but not lives. But, some times someone always wants more than the other.

the late phoenix said...

atiya: i wonder...if i just try this...bingo!

B: if i'm eating my salt crackers and still think it's the '80s/'90s, i can watch DUCKTALES anytime

PaganPrincess said...

Ducktails was fun, no doubt. I think I'd rather watch Bugs Bunny, though

the late phoenix said...

pagan: historians will look back at DUCKTALES as one of the most intense, complex, and thoroughly-written series of all time, i still count that episode with Scrooge and the Mayan gold temple with that giant turning wheel with the face as one of my best artistic influences

Jack and Jill said...

I didn't watch Duck Tales during its original run. Not sure why; I suspect the fact that it debuted when I was eleven, and way too into G.I. Joe.

-Jack

the late phoenix said...

jj: i'm just catching up to the '80s GI Joes now, i'm especially loving that full-length feature movie they did that even hit the movie-theater screens back in the day, the one where you see Cobra Commander's true face without the silver mask