Wednesday, February 13, 2013

SSS: OUTSIDE THE CIRCLE

*CLICKY CLICKY*
click above on The Outer Limits, probably the most famous episode, attic, for #3 in the series.
so, what's goin' on this week?
let's see, let's see
i need your solutions, my people, it's about my cat, i've tried everything, but i don't know how i'm gonna set up the sleeping arrangements at night, i've tried every combination.
the cat needs to be in my room during the night, at least be able to access my room all throughout the night with a door ajar, because my room is where the litter box, food, and water are, so in case he gets thirsty, hungry, and needs to go during the night, he can all 3. if he gets frisky, well, that's on him. i can't sleep in the same room as the cat during the night because he relentlessly nibbles on my toes, scratches my face, won't let me sleep on my stomach, i have to sleep awkwardly in a very narrow sliver of my already-narrow bed, cupping him from all sides in a right circle of blanket on the right side of my bed or he won't calm down and join me in sleep, he'll just stay awake the entire night like a stoned college kid waiting the last minute to do his 90%-of-his-grade essay due 7AM next morn. the cat will jump on top of things that shouldn't be jumped on, he'll find height wherever it exists, he'll sharpen his teeth on outdated bronze tacks on my crumbling white plaster walls, he'll chew on the ipad mini charging wire, if he continues to do that, i won't have the power to type and blog these little posts i blog for you anymore...
...update on that particular problem: i put the ipad wire into a drawer and shut the drawer...
i can't charge my blessed ipad mini in the same room when he's sleeping with me in said room, he'll just chew on the wire sneakily after i fall asleep, and i wake up to an unplug and a 40% charged :(
solution: charge it in another room, use another socket
there's still the central problem: i can't sleep in my bedroom when he's in the bedroom, he needs to be in my bedroom 'cause that's where his supplies are, i can sleep in another room with a deadbolt on, problem is he can escape my bedroom very easily because there is no lock on my bedroom door, he can escape into the living room area during the night, i don't want that because a roommate can loudly open the main door in this living room area in the middle of the night, breaking the silence in a startling, key-clanging manner, the cat could get spooked and fly out into the outside night, *sad face*...the living room is where the cat's house structure is, 3 levels of cat paradise on a carpet pole with the fuzz ball on a string, the cat has been known to sleep soundly on the top level of the house, but again, he's exposed in the living area to an unruly drunk roommate coming back the middle of the night.
what is the math answer? how much do bedroom locks cost? how will my poor ipad get charged?
this is more complicated than Schrodinger's cat.
i was so stressed this week, i accidentally put his pee in the tube to get tested instead of what the kindly vet wanted, poo. i was clearing his litterbox, i surrounded the first big clump i saw and instinctively broke it down into two dusty, sand-laden pieces and put them in the tube...only at lunchtime did i realize i put his molded pee into the test tube, not a nice smelly lump of poo...i can't tell the difference anymore between numbers 1 and 2...maybe 'cause i was a test-tube baby myself i got thrown off seeing the tube.
CLICK HERE, I FEEL LIKE AN OUTSIDER WHO CAN'T GRASP THIS WORLD.
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5 comments:

Unknown said...

I would get a substantially smaller place to keep the kitty in overnight (we used to put our kittens in the bathroom with all needed supplies and shut the door until morning. Once they got to be a couple months old they were fine (of course it did help there were two of them to keep each other company. Maybe a crate in your room until Satan kitty gets a little older?

:*

~Kazi xxx

Missed Periods said...

It's your fault. Your toes are simply delicious.

the late phoenix said...

kazi: yeah, i've heard of that bathroom trick before, thanks :)...now if only i had a bathroom...big enough...

Jenny: it's been so long since i had my toes sucked, i need a current assessment to see if they are in fact still delicious...

Cheeky Minx said...

I suspect you fire up a good many kitties...

the late phoenix said...

cheeky: *purr*