notes:
* Boc: if all you need are ice packs, that's a DREAM.
* Jean Harlow: my butt.........is my butt. look how good my butt looks against the rocks like that!!! all stretchy and moldable like Play-Doh.
* Play-Doh: i still work as wallpaper glue, don't eat me when i'm like that.
Curly from The Three Stooges: i ate all the Play-Doh, sorry.
Brooke Shields: the original gunk was white. but now you can join me at the lagoon when the clay color is blue...
Play-Doh: i'm great for dementia.
crones and monks: why you looking at us?
* Captagon: not Captain America...
* Jean Harlow: lemonade don't taste as good unless it's a dime...
* Molly Qerim: i don't know when it happened. but it happened. Good Morning Football eclipsed us. Good Morning Football is a better show than First Take.
Jamie Erdahl: right?
Kyle Brandt: you love me because i use the word pittance to describe football in the morning.
* Boc: my sensational spiritual seagulls.
* Fuerza: yeah just keep all the flags at half-mast, there's no point in raising them up ever again...
* Ear Horn: my favorite six-six-six-spice...
* puckered jeans: the jeans Puck wore.
Shakespeare: ...
* Boc: i despise the show Yellowstone.........but i like the park...
* youtube: i kissed nuclear waste to prove a point...
* cheechako: a newcomer to pot-smoking marijuana.........in Alaska and the Yukon and the Northwest Territories and the Canadian Gold Rush...
* me: how are you liking "Now and Then"?
Jen R: kinda slow...
me: i find it would have fit nicely in the Sgt. Pepper's album...
Jen R: i mean it's not the REAL Last Beatles Song tho, it's an AI song.
* club buster: when Dan Cortese enters the club.
Dan Cortese: and my wife is Doryce.
* pimento cheese: can only be eaten on a golf course...
* mommy hit: marijuana, a wife's revenge...
* atmospheric river: was i a thing in the '80s? i didn't exist back then. the first time i heard the term atmospheric river was in 2015, that was the year of the first atmospheric river. imma fucking midair waterfall.
* Boc: oh I'M the weird one for walking this early but there's a damp wrinkled pantyhose on the street. saw a beer stein carved into Jesus's body through an RV window. my psychiatrist makes me take all these walks. i'm on the bricklaying committee!!!
* Leslie Sbrocco: my tits are more magnificent than you could ever imagine, ever CONCEIVE OF!!! my tits are at least TEN TIMES THE MAGNIFICENCE of what you are envisioning now...
* Pasquale from Chuck E. Cheese: the best part of the pepperoni is the GREY part...
* Ego Nwodim: um Lorne, we can't do Pizza Hut skits on SNL, i need the money.
* iPhone Titanium: turns your world into Pandora.........no this is not a diamond-jewelry commercial...
* Macy's kid: i lost my belief in Santa Claus when i realized these nonstick pans still sticked.
Santa: thanks for the fuzzy slippers, kid. you want a pony?
Macy's kid: i'm a boy.
* woman: i got bowel urgency.
man: where is that on the map?
woman: you can't eat grilled-cheese sandwiches when it's snowing.
* Hyundai Tucson fam at the Undead Head stadium.
husband: did we lock the car?
wife: we don't have a car.
husband: i have a LONG RETRACTABLE ARM that spans the length of the entire globe.
wife: i know, when we were dating you said that was your penis not your arm.
* Melissa Griffey: i can't do this GEICO ad, i'm not an actor.
Ken Griffey, Jr.: neither am i. got any bubblegum?
* Chevrolet: ditch the Chevy car, travel everywhere by whitewater kayak.
* gamer: don't worry, i'm just doing in real life that thing Link does in Tears of the Kingdom where he SHOOTS HIGH UP INTO THE AIR from a temple tower hole in a bungee-cord harness to take a map photo. honestly that whole maneuver is WEIRD.
* Timothee Chalamet for Bleu de Chanel: i'm not a superhero like the guy before me, i'm a chocolatemaker. i don't know why they chose me for this, i have green eyes...
* man with goatee: i'll have the avocado toast nix the toast.
Pati Jinich: avocados are only found in Mexico.
* John Travolta: THIS is the Big One. if only the Super Bowl was played on Christmas. Donna Pescow!!!
Donna Pescow: nobody knows i did Saturday Night Fever, they only know me as a sitcom mom.
Gabe Kotter: you still haven't seen Saturday Night Fever? it's STILL the only way to watch a new episode of Welcome Back, Kotter...
* Mastercard: TRUE Red Sox fans wear red socks. you can only get red socks during Christmas...
* Denair: the only way to play Little League in Modesto.
happy weekend, my babies.
TOMORROW: who needs DoorDash when we got Jackie's chicken curry!!!
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