FLOWER STATION: ROOM-SIZED BED OF ROSES

 

Angie: what?

Brad: you're ashamed of me.

Angie: how so?

Brad: you never want me to be seen around pink posies. with pink posies. i can never be swimming in pink posies. you don't think i'm a man, you think i'm a sissy.

Angie: no that's not it. you're allergic to pink posies.

Brad: i am?

Angie: see? i know you better than you know yourself. i notice things about you you miss. that's how much i love you.

Brad: mom always said i wasn't a man, i was a mollusk, but i think she was talking about my hair...

Trinity, Talia, and Greykid on New Year's Eve wearing cat-size party hats with NO string: countdown cats...

McDonald's: our hamburgers are locally-grown...

McDonald's: when the Coke sits out for an hour and starts to taste like brown dishwater...

Melissa Maker: don't wear 2026 glasses for New Year's, wear 6-7 glasses.

Dolly Parton: watermelon milk...

Japan: ...

RC: the MELLOW cola. the cola that won't fuck you up like Diet Coke, trick you like Coca-Cola Classic, cheat you like Pepsi.

Greece: we celebrate the New Year at 30 past the hour...

Showtime in the '90s: Red Shoe Diaries was The Outer Limits without the sci-fi...

cowboys: we'll NEVER eat garlic.

Melissa Maker: you can't be fun and a divorced mom.

starting school.

for a well-worn weary college student after Christmas break: a drag. the dregs. get out of that PhD program with a dirt excuse and become a hippie.

for a child entering preschool never having gone to school before: terrifying. hideous. grotesque. is this what life is gonna be like?...

Matt Pinfield: MTV may be going dark, but i'll always be your pasty Uncle Fester giving you bands like Helmet and Sunny Day Real Estate. the show is now called The Fastest 3 Minutes In Music and is YouTube-only but you can't kill the good music!!! you can't pretend the good stuff doesn't exist. you can't global local. you can't imagine indie as a dream...

Temple of the Dog "Hunger Strike": i don't mind stealing bread from the mouths of decadence. except the Wonder Bread mascot, he seems sad. fire's on the table, the Thai-chicken curry soup's cooking. blood is on the table, we're overworking...

Bernie Sanders: i wrote a children's book about billionaires but that's neither here nor there. i filled my nose with the savory smell of fresh urban coffee, for the first time in 60 years i can walk the streets of New York City again...

Mamdani: the city coffee is back to being dirty, not corporate.

the room in the back is 3/4 FILLED with a bed of long-stem red roses leaving air at the top of the ceiling for the two naked lovers to rest their weary knees.

Brad: we need to keep our knees soft.

Angie slowly sensuously removes Brad's Christmas sweater.

Angie: you're the first man ever to take off his ugly Christmas sweater and then fuck.

Brad with squirmy eyes: what technique are you using?

Angie: i watched Jackie suck off Walker.

Walker: i figured with all the crazy stuff i do---eyes of a homeless man, blond stubble beard, walking Falkor the dog, riding my noisy oversize metal motorcycle all over town---that would one day lead to getting my dick sucked.

Jackie Fitzgerald: you have the wizened eyes of someone who is not computer literate.

Walker: slobber all over my cock for 2 hours, that's what i was thinking. i don't know, i'm new to this relationship thing.

Jackie: sucking a man's cock is an art passed down from mother to daughter, learned and honed after many years, many generations.  

Walker: you promised i could move your head with my hand ONCE. that's when i knew you were my lady.

Jackie: slow. deepthroat. using my own old-lady spit. let the man know you appreciate that he's at least TRYING to be macho. make that dick-suck his reward for a LIFETIME of his trying. 

Walker: until i REALLY cum.

Angie: oh Brad, by the way, Walker is your father.